Going Crazy 4DPIUI

Well I've officially lost it and I'm only 4 days into my TWW.


IUI        - bloating, cramps, feeling hopeful
1DPIUI - lots of cramps, increased CM
2DPIUI - slight cramps
3DPIUI - bloating, gassy, could be from all the stress eating
4DPIUI - exhausted from no sleep, arm twinges, knees hurt, are those cramps?

My mind is playing awful tricks on me. I can be sitting down feeling absolutely no symptoms at all, then I start to tell myself I feel slight twinges or cramping on my left side. Then suddenly I'm in an all out sweat, everything hurts, I have a massive headache, and I tell myself either I'm pregnant or my long lost period is about to show up. Why is it that I can dish out advise but when it comes to myself I don't listen. Has anyone actually taken their own advise?

I told myself I didn't want to test out the trigger shot and now I'm second guessing my decision. When's the earliest I can test? Should I just wait for my beta test? Do I have enough medicine to start the next cycle if this doesn't work? Am I pregnant?

These thoughts plus a million more float through my head constantly. If I hear one more person say just relax I may lose it. During the day I can distract myself with work, decorating our new home, or eating but once the sun goes down I completely lose touch with reality. I've attempted guided meditation on YouTube and color coordinated my closet at 3am. I've been finding Spotify very useful as well. I've now listened to all their sleep channels, one of my favorites is Hush Little Darlings.

I have plenty of daytime activities planned for the next 10 days, however I'm lacking distraction at night. Besides drugging myself my options are fairly limited.